Winter Updates

Its the end of the year, and I figured it would be nice to share some updates!

This year has been JAM PACKED with action.

Incredible moments of breakdown,

followed with incredible moments of uplift.

Gotta love the waves of life, right?

There's a good amount of happenings to update you all on.

The main update is that SUPER AWESOME VAN PLAN is still moving forward.

Check out that blog to stay up to date on where we are at in the process.

http://superawesomevanplan.blogspot.com 

The second update is that I'm working at a super nice nursing home

in the northern suburbs of Chicago.

The facility and the people and the patients are just incredible.

Such a hard working and motivated group. 

The 3rd update, it that I'm finally in the editing process of some yoga/motivation video content.

I've been sharing media since they came out with built-in cameras on computers. 

I still get a little nervous to put stuff out there.

I've finally decided to shut down my inner critic for a bit and just produce the content.

The first set of videos with focus on CORE ACTIVATION.

One the most important, yet overlooked aspects of functional movement.

Will it be perfect?

NO

Is it top notch production?

No.

Will the classes be against the backdrop of a tropical beach?

No.

Will the exercises be effective and beneficial?

YES.

Will the videos be accessible to all?

YES.

The videos are based on the concept of "dirtbag yoga".

"Dirtbag" is a term originally from the climbing community.

It's used to describe the type of lifestyle that comes naturally 

when you simplify and pursue the activity you love the most. 

It is not tidy and put together.

It is not edited nor shiny nor elegant.

It is what it is. 

Using creativity and problem solving to use what you've got right in front of you.

These will be practical videos with an emphasis on novice practitioners.

All you need is your body and a willing mind.

Lastly, I've been writing more music!

Hoping to flood my youtube channel with music and exercise videos.

Coming at you live, straight from mama's basement. 

It will never be perfect,

the timing, the space, your outfit

Don't wait for the perfect timing,

Just do it, and keep doing it.

Goodbye Cook Farm

SO much has happened.

I've been steeping in deep lessons from farm life.

The experience has really been something I will never forget.

The work has been tough.

The days have been long, some have been short.

My skin is a toasted dark mocha brown,

My cheeks a constant rouge.

My back, my hips, my feet, my hands

All speaking loudly in the mornings with stiffness from the last day's work.

Honest work.

Work that requires a constant moving

Work that is repetitive & meditative 

Work that is dirt & bugs 

Work that is rashes & sweat

The process of farming good quality veggies requires hard honest work

Or otherwise some expensive technology

It requires you to get on the ground

in the ground.

I thought I was tough.

That sun reminded me 

Some weeks day in and out

That I'm nothing 

but a burning little speck of dust.

I'm so glad for this experience.

I'm totally burned out.

I will miss the days on that 7ish acre farm.

I will miss the morning sunrise

The sound of roosters in the morning

The little shiny morning gems of dew

perfectly still and balanced in-between the curly edges of kale.

The rainbow luminescent stalks of swiss chard.

The feeling of wet muddy sucking between each toe of my barefoot.

The scene of light brown weed-ridden dirt 

scuffle-hoed into a deep brown weed-free zone.

The bird's eye view of baskets filled with the 

amazingly vibrant color scheme of a fresh harvest.

The rocking of my body in the back of the truck,

eyes closed & swimming in sweat

 with the cool wind beating my face 

right after the sun had just finished beating me too.

What a freaking life.

I will miss the creatures, humans too,

all the quirks and interactions

convos & soul transactions.

Yum.

Thank you Cook farm.

Brushing the Dreads Out Pt. 2

Why did you decide to brush them out?

I'd had a few intinctual tickles during the past year about cutting them.

Also, I was beginning to get tired of some of the downsides that come with having dreads.

My scalp felt irritated from the varied tension, dreads like to grow into one another.

Not to mention, the washing process started to feel tedious and lengthy.

I figured I had two options:

1. Up my game and consistancy with maintenance (washing, DRYING, & separating).

2. Brush them out, reduce scalp tension, and accept a new style.

I'm lazy about certain things, one of those things includes hair maintenance.

So I opted for #2! :)

How did you comb them out?

I purchased a metal dog comb from Petco for about $6.

It was the only thing strong enough to get through a several dreads in one sitting. 

Pictured Below: Beastly hair weapon.

Did you use any products?

I used a detangler for the first couple of dreads. I also washed them with conditioner that had avocado and olive oil in it. However, after getting through some of them, I found it WAY easier to brush them out dry. For the future, I suggest brushing them out dry from the start and skipping the condtioner/detangler. The detangler is GREAT for natural hair (once the dreads are brushed out).

How long did it take?

I had 100 dreads. Some of them, about 4 maybe, were actually 2 dreads bundled into one!

Each dread took about 15-20 minutes.

That is 2,000 minutes.

That is 33 hours and 20 minutes.

From start to finish, it took me about 3 weeks.

By about midway, I had a pretty ruthless and efficient little system. I could get 4 out per hour each day. Some days I would puchout like 7 and feel really accomplished and hopeful.

Other days I rested, because the process took some real muscle endurance.

What lessons did you learn from combing out your dreads?

Definitely learned alot about being patient with life's process, being patient with others, and most importantly being patient with oneself. I found myself rushing alot, too, only to find quicker burn out and a need for longer rest periods. 

One day, while in the heat of it, I was combing out a 2 for 1 dread and observing how rough the process looked. It was full of tearing, pinching, pulling, repeat. I would occassionally clip my thumb with the metal because of plain old upperbody and fine motor fatigue. I developed some good calluses and little scars, too.

In this process I experienced the truth that any good thing found worthy of accomplishing is going to require a process that feels anything but comfortable. The worth and value is in looking back on the work. The aquisition of the things that your soul craves usually requires a rough and bumpy, and sort of messy, process. It's amazing, because the struggle in that mess makes the outcome taste that much better. :) 

Would you get dreadlocks again?

I will never say never. Its hard to say because of how much I'm feeling the new style and scalp relief.

**Disclaimer: I had a sensitive scalp prior to locking my hair. I attempted to oil my scalp with dreads, however it didn't seem to provide relief.**

What does hair maintenance look like now?

Hair maintenance now looks simple!

Thanks to my wonderful mama aka Helen's HomeStyle Hair, I am currently rocking a short/medium length afro. I don't have to worry about getting my head wet in the shower at night, simply because hair drying time isn't as lengthy. Now I just shampoo, condition, detangle, and braid or let free. Now that I'm back into the routine of it, its actually a quick process. Another thing, I ABSOLUTELY LOVE the feeling of a brush around my scalp in a hot shower. Mega. Mad. Feels. #treatyourself #sensorybreaksOT #feelthefeels #scalpmassage. Who hashtags in blogs...? 

Me.

STAY TUNED: Next up, story about a fun series of creative yoga videos for ALL levels. 

Brushing the Dreads

I grew up hating my natural hairs.

Like deep hate, the messy cry face kind.

When I considered locking up my hair, 

I thought it would be the ultimate solution 

to the problem I'd built around the type of hair I have.  

Lots of people ask questions about my hair.

So here are listed the pros/cons of dreads.

And other dread questions.

Dreadlock Pros:

-Mystical Look

-More Conventional than Afro

-Easy Styling

-Less Maintenance (Daily)

-No hair products

Dreadlock Cons:

-Increased Maintenance Time

Must Dry Completely (1-2 hours)

-Scalp Irritation from Knotting

-Increased weight/thickness

-Must Rip apart regularly to prevent Congos

_____________________________________________________________

Dreadlock Questions/Answers

How did you make them?

I backcombed and twisted 100 1-2 inch sections of my hair with a comb.

How long did it take?

It took me 1.5 days to complete. 

However, I ended up having to re-backcomb all of them after 3 months

How do you wash them?

Most common question. I wash them the way you'd wash out a sponge.

Squeeze and add water. Squeeze and add shampoo.

Squeeze and add water.

I occasionally used DreadHeadHQ shampoo.

Then I started using baking soda and apple cider vinegar.

Doesn't your scalp itch?

Yes, but no more than it normally would. I have naturally dry skin.

How do you prevent them from getting mold?

If they get wet, you MUST dry them as thoroughly as possible. Dreads are composed of your hair, the hair you lose/shed, and small bits of lint and other micro material. Allowing dreads to hold water for too long could encourage contamination.

What do you do if you don't want them anymore?

I never knew how to answer this question, as I hadn't planned or felt the desire to not have dreads. I figured I would just cross that bridge when I arrived.

I arrived!

Turns out brushing them out works.

What a process.

Leave a comment below 

if you want to know more about the process 

and the lessons I learned

 from patiently choosing to comb out 

100 dreadlocks!

Coming next:

Combing The Dreads Out

Questions/Answers

Why did you decide to brush them out?

How did you comb them out?

Did you use any products?

How long did it take?

What lessons did you learn from combing out your dreads?

Would you get dreadlocks again?

What does hair maintenance look like now?

#weeklyreflections

 

This past week, definitely felt like I was about to burst. Everything felt like it requires the efforts of my entire life to complete. But here I am, still breathing still living still doing. 

Relevant.

I started a larger sized dream catcher. 

I usually can get them done quickly and well without much force.

This go around, I was forcing it.

I got all the way to the center ring and pull too tight allowing too much tension, and POP!! About 3 freaking beads literally stapped in half and shot across the room, leaving huge holes in my work. 

The how was "tension".

So I went and undid the entire dream catcher and attempted to change the how. Still in progress.

#weeklyreflections

So…has anyone else felt like their throat, nose, and sinus have transformed their membranes into rugged sand paper? This week I've had to work around some allergy and sinus issues that have made things way less fun. 

Of course, it has sort of been on and off. Little allergy outbursts where my eyes, throat, and nose feel so dry and itchy and MAD. Thankfully, there have also been some clearer moments sprinkled in. 

In the middle of an "allergy fit" so to speak, I noticed how much tension I let into my body.

I would scrunch my nose, forcing air in and out to "clear the mucus".

I would shrug my shoulders up as I rubbed my itchy nose and aggressively attempted to hock loogees (a professional term) to "get the bug out". 

In those "tense" moments I felt like this:

"WHY MEEEEEEEEE?!?! I JUST WANT A REGULAR FACE THAT DOESN'T ITCH AND FEELT DRY!!!! WAAAAAAA…."

I definitely feel, in my own experiences of suffering, that my brain instantly wants to convince me I am totally alone in the situation. That I'm alone, and no one else in the world has experienced this same suffering and that it will never go away.

What a silly mind.

We are never alone in suffering. In fact, it is the suffering that creates our most potent abilities to connect with one another. It's called compassion.

Com= with/together

Passion= to suffer

It is the greatest kind of love. To come down and suffer with someone, or to accept someone willing to suffer through with you. It turns out, tons of people are experiencing the same feelings with their sinuses and such. Perhaps some seasonal shift effect. I was never truly alone, just fussing too loudly to realize the presence of company.

#weeklyreflections

This was such a relevant teaching for me this week.
Such an emphasis on keeping your head in the present moment.
Not letting the mind pull you into past or future.
I pulled this little #wisdomnote from the jar the weekend I left my parents phone plan.
I had a perfect idea of how things would go.
I would get to leave the family plan without any fees
And then I would punch in my phones info to join a new online phone company.

Didn't exactly flow that way.
I failed to do more in depth and upfront research on the company I'd plan to join.
Which set me back, ALOT
So, if you've tried to contact me via phone/text lately, I'm sorry I couldn't respond!
I've been without phone/text/internet right in my palm for about a week.

Initially, it felt like I was missing a huge something.
Like I was regressing because of the lack of connection.
I couldn't access whatever information I wanted, whenever I wanted.

This piece of wisdom kept me a float.
Reading it every morning helped me to access the information right in front of me.
When ever I wanted.
I really came to understand how much distraction I allow
to stop me from filling up my free time in a more productive manner.
It's crazy.
I've loved it.
I've been tapping into free wifi just to keep my blog and #100daysofgratitude going.
And to manage some mini bits of online business.
Other than those little moments of free wifi,
I'm forced to look my free time in the face
forced to really think about what actions I want to plant right now
in order to potentially see a certain fruit later.

Life reminding me through my own little situation to return to the present moment.

#weeklyreflections

Week 2. 

So...is anyone else a slight control freak?

Wanting to have a death grip on every single moment, so that things are comfortable, predictable, self-gratifying?

A predictable life is not a true life. 

Life by its very own nature is insecure.

Life by its very own nature is temporary and fleeting. 

When we try so hard to run the show, we forget that this life isn't necessarily "ours". It is the greatest gift, that we must savor and perhaps later return. There are greater plans attempting to work through our beings. Plans that are nourishing to the whole of humanity once fullfilled. Nourish the whole and each part is nourished, too. 

When we boss around life, giving it a name, and putting it on a leash, we are no longer in free relationship to it. We close off the open communication between ourselves and our experience. 

Planning requires a future mind. 

Of course, there is some practicality in making a plan. However, I'm learning as I go that I can plan all I want, writing the most amazing story for myself, only to continually find myself at point of realization that the best plan is to plan on being repeatedly surprised, shaken, and recreated. 

Quit stressing out over your story line, and just live the story with as much heart as you can. 

It's heart that ties you too this moment. The richest experience of NOW ❤️

Can you think of a time when you crafted a perfect plan, dotted every -i and crossed every -t only to find out that life decided to unravel in a completely opposite direction? 

Share your experiences with this in the comments or join my email list !

I'd love to hear from you. 

This week, I had the perfect plan of hopping off of my parents' phone plan and joining the big girl world of having my own phone bill. I had every step planned out, polished and smooth. Turns out the company I'm switching too doesn't consider my phone compatible, which is a whole other can of worms. This leaves me phone-less for the week….not what I planned. 

BUT, no phone/internet requires a greater demand of creativity and present-mindedness, qualities that enrich humanity as a whole…it wasn't my plan, but it seems like it is working out for the greater good of things. 

Perhaps life is really calling upon my heart to come out and play a little more this week. 

Until next week loves. <3

Xoxo 

Miss Dee

#weeklyrelections

This. 

I filled a little jar 

with 50 little pieces 

of brain food 

Harvested from my heart 

to help me endure 

each work week.

This is week 1.

First concept is such a truth for me.

Every person I encounter 

Every situation 

Is a medicinal dose

Prescribed to crack me open

To burst my seems

To unleash my highest 

To deliver my dreams 

Especially the uncomfortable moments

The irritating moments 

Where one is vulnerable, exposed

Uncertain.

Wanting to close up, run away, escape.

I experienced a lot of those this week.

Facing unpredictability

Groundlessness

Breathing helped me 

Take in the moment's medicine.

Opening up, again and again.

Living life's lessons. 

Follow along each week to see what kinds of brain food I'm consuming in the attempt to keep it together by, sometimes, letting it fall apart. 

<3 xoxo

DeeEm

Thursday Happenings

Creative space with a sweet sweet sister. Peanut butter icecream, avocado, colored pencils and paint all included. Deep convos on love & life not pictured :)

Post play date plantains...I always forget about their deliciousness. Yum yum. 

Post-play bug bites...biggest one I've had in a while...not so yum.

Thank you bugs

Thank you sista friend 

Thank you plantains & PB icecream.

Thank you Thursday happenings. 

Amen <3

Cold Rainy Days in a Hot Summer Month

Cold and rainy weather. Not hatin' just statin'. It's happening, and this is how it's happening for me :) 

Naturally Yours: Southwestern Chicken Soup

Featuring: state of the art cat hair

 A supportive kitty and cozy blanket make practice tests way eaiser... Too bad neither can come with. Testing accomodations include: small grey warm hairballs and red blankets, please. 

Warm brown liquids and slippers and a few Manji whiskers. 

#rainydayrecipe

What's is yours? 

Cuddles Training

Jumanji, for whatever reason, didn't and still doesn't really like to be held. She meows when you pick her up and fights her way down. So, I's decided to pick her up for at least once a day, breathe while holding her, and watch how long she cooperates. After almost a year, this happened. It is rare, but a sign of cuddle training effectiveness. Yay #cuddleswin

Good good good FOOD

This new apartment has some AMAZING kitchen space. Don't get me wrong, it's nothing fancy, but it definitely is way more counter space than I am used to ;). Been letting the kitchen have its way with me, and I can't complain about the outcomes. 

Wild rice over broccoli, with rice noodles and curry sauce. Prepared by Tom :)

Black pepper cherry basil sauté, Manji approved. 

 Brazilian Date cup :) 

Hot Brazilians not included.

Chopped up dates

Cinnamon 

Chopped Brazilian nuts

Thick Coconut milk from a can

Layer and eat :)

     Chocolate-chip Banana Rice Bread 

This one lasts about an hour before we've munched it all up...so if you ever get a piece, you're extra special :)

Cue adorable cat photo: 

Loving it all up, including you. 

Xoxo Dee Em

Fruit Smoothies & Chocolate Mandalas

Some more weekend shenanigans. 

Impromptu of course. 

No plan. 

Strawberries, blueberries, banana

Egg yoke 

Whey Protein

Maybe some other ingredients I forgot. 

It's not a success unless you spill 

Straws are required 

Oh and fancy glasses a must

Best when consumed alongside someone you love and trust.

Post smoothie chocolate mandalas are optional 

Shenanigans pt 3

#springtimeshenanigans 

Mini adventure up North to Chicago to do some gardening work for Tom's mama. There is nothing like being in the sun, digging in the dirt, stretching, and giving some plant loving. Here are some pictures (because who doesn't like pictures) from the impromptu photo shoot directed by the one of the best photographers, Toms dad. 

Just alittle Judo hip throw after working. :)

Shenanigans pt 2

We put the grill together & smashed. Sunday funday fa real. 

Purple asparagus cooked to green. 

Manji got some outside time too <3 appearantly dandelions are totally her thing. 

Crushing the Butterfly

I think I first heard this phrase from Ido Portal (his webpage is posted below). It has been a phrase and lesson that life has constantly and continuously been making present to me through various circumstances. Clearly, this is a challenging pill for me to swallow.

Loving and living my early twenties is a blessing and curse.
While I feel somewhat in my "prime",  having natural youth and vitality at my fingertips for just a little while longer, each year that passes I come to realize how short this will last and just how important the practice is over time, whatever the practice may be. With this natural youth and vitality due purely to age, I find myself filled up with a constant buzz of ambition.

Ambition is great, as it is an ingredient for persistence and perseverance.
However, too much ambition is just as bad as none.
This is where I find myself lately.

Too much ambition, no direction. 
I want to do everything and be everywhere all at once.
I want to do "great things".

The thing is…if you just keep doing…little by little, great things happen.

So, do the do.

When there is too much ambition and no direction, it can feel like I'm so "far behind". The thought of feeling behind can ruin everything if I let it, because it is a major lie one can believe. We as humans can only do so much…and the rest is left to synchronicity. So, just do what you can do, now.

This overload of ambition is what can crush the butterfly. It's like a baby, so eager to walk but hasn't yet learned to stand. 

The strength in ambition's drive can quickly turn into greed and devaluation of one's own experience. It fuels the wanting to be somewhere other than where you are at.

We are all right where we need to be, when we need to be…simply because we all ARE.

Dance and the butterfly will dance with you. Try to chase and catch it, and you will crush and kill the very thing you wanted.
Just do the doing, step by step, & let go of the rest. 

Fullfiling-Full Moon

Happy Full Moon! 

Now is a time of manifesting,

Self testing. 

We finished the move,

Settled into familiar space 

Feels as though 

With a new face

& with new eyes too. 

A full moon to remind me

There's nothing I can't do. 

I move &

you move too. 

Letting Go

Easier said than done, I worked so hard on this piece and it holds a lot of emotional relevance for me. But, it's time for new beginnings. Luckily we feel it, we know it, and that's all we need. 

Moving Back Home

One of my favorite places in Blono is pictured above, the Coffee Hound. It is one place I will always feel at home. This is just one of the many reasons I'm so excited to return to Blono! 

It has been quite interesting to watch my perspective of my hometown shift and change over the last 2 years.  

I was always eager to be somewhere else. I generally felt like Blono had little to offer, was boring, and used to become adgitated by the thought of running into people everytime I'd leave the house. 

While living in Washington IL, working part time, and going through an intensive certification program...my time felt pretty limited. All of my connections to community were scattered amongst the surrounding towns of Peoria, most of which take a 20-30 minute drive to reach. Although I greatly enjoyed the quiet sleepy town of Washington, its amazing park reserves, and the feelings of independence based on my circumstance, I'm so excited to return home. 

WAY More than I would have imagined. 

Although I didn't go far, life has really showed me that every place, person, and circumstance has something to offer.  However, if you refuse to look, you will not see. 

Get ready Blono, looking to do some big things with you in this next year. 

Reasons why Blono is bad ass: 

-Coffee Hound

-Farmers Market Saturdays and Tuesdays 

-Easy Bike Commuting 

-Gardening Community 

- ISU students

-Main Street Yoga

-Diverse communities 

-Familiar faces everywhere 

-Constitution Trail

See you very soon <3